


From Me to You

by Marmoniel



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Established Relationship, Established for 2/3 of it, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, Sort Of, whereas Caleb comes into the relationship like 'what...'
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-02-26 09:21:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21847378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marmoniel/pseuds/Marmoniel
Summary: When Caleb Widogast find himself in a world without magic, where he and his friends are enrolled at a university, he must scramble to find his place in the world, while trying to find a way back.
Relationships: Caduceus Clay/Caleb Widogast, Caduceus Clay/Mollymauk Tealeaf, Caduceus Clay/Mollymauk Tealeaf/Caleb Widogast, Jester Lavorre/Beauregard Lionett/Yasha, Mollymauk Tealeaf/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 50
Kudos: 253





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoy!
> 
> I'm only up to episode 79, so excuse any contingency errors for what I haven't yet seen.

It happened when they were hunting a wizard for the Gentleman.

Everyone had been teasing Caleb about whether he felt guilty for destroying one of his own kind. As in, nerdy, bookish, wizards. Caleb bore the friendly taunts with patience borne of knowing the place of affection that the teasing came from.

They had found the shack on the edge of town where the wizard had been seen leaving, and Nott had come back, reporting that she’d disabled several traps, but it was now safe to go into.

Inside, they found a trapdoor leading down into darkness. After Nott found a Glyph of Warding on the trapdoor, Jester dispelled it, and down they went into the fun probable murder hole, where Caleb really hoped the wizard hadn’t been keeping all the bodies of the people he’d killed.

The ensuing fight once they got down there and found the wizard in the midst of casting a spell was fierce. 

Every member of the Mighty Nein took at least one hit, with Caleb getting knocked unconscious but then being healed by Cadueceus.

Caleb had come to with the firbolg leaning over him, offering him a hand up. An exhausted Caleb who just wanted the battle to be over already took it.

But finally, they prevailed, and managed to kill the man, having all decided that the wizard was too dangerous to keep alive.

With hands pressed to his still bleeding wounds, Caleb limped over to a wall to lean on and collect himself for a few moments, while everyone was dealing with aftermath from the battle.

He’d endured several hits from the wizard’s lightning attacks, and a spell that created a literal cloud of daggers, which while mostly giving him superficial injuries, had given him a few deeper slashes from the malicious blades.

Caleb put a hand onto the wall, and looked up alarmed as something glowed blue under his palm. When he pulled his hand away, he saw a series of runes, glowing on the wall. At the thought of it injuring him in some way, he pulled his hand back and looked at it, but besides the smears of blood on it from his own wounds, he wasn’t changed in any way.

“I think that I did something,” He called out, and his friends quickly came over to look.

Caleb decided to take a closer look at the runes.

They were in an unfamiliar languages, and even as he pulled out his spell book to cast Comprehend Languages, the runes stopped glowing and left behind a blank wall.

“Did you do something to make them glow?” Beau said.

“They just started doing that when I put my hand on the wall.” Caleb said.

“Did you never learn to keep your hands to yourself as a child?” Beau said, but she still looked concerned.

Caleb decided to ignore her, and looked around the room to see if anything had changed, but in his injured state he was having trouble focusing on the room at all.

“Ah, let me help you with that, friend,” Caduceus said, putting a hand on Caleb’s shoulder and he felt the warm healing energy flow through him, closing his wounds, and invigorating him.

Nodding his thanks to Caduceus, Caleb again scanned the room for any changes, but he couldn’t see anything different from during the fight. The room was the same as before, with a comforting lack of bodies, and tables full of medical instruments and scattered papers in Draconic.

After several minutes of the group arguing over the importance of the glowing runes, they decided to monitor Caleb (as the one who’d activated them) and to stay in the room as they took a long rest, in case something had been activated.

“Yes, Nott, I feel fine,” Caleb said for what felt like the thousandth time. “I will feel much better after some rest though, so let us sleep, yes?”

“Put the dome up then, Caleb, if you don’t mind. I could certainly do with some rest,” Fjord said. 

Sitting on the floor of the underground area of the wizard’s shack, Caleb pulled out a small crystal bead and ritually cast the dome. Eventually, the whole of the Mighty Nein settled inside, and everyone got ready to rest.

Caleb and Beau were on first watch, and even as Caleb was keeping an eye on the room, he found himself growing tireder and tireder.

“You sure it’s not some kind of effect from the runes?” Beau said.

“Nein, I am not sure. But seeing as everyone else is feeling the same tired, I would guess not.”

“Yeah, alright, that’s fair.”

They sat in silence for some time.

“Beauregard?” Caleb said.

“Yeah?”

“Do you ever wonder where you’d be if you hadn’t met this group of assholes?”

“Well, I’d probably be kicking ass in the name of the Cobalt Soul.”

“Ja. Of course.”

“I’d definitely still be more of an asshole though.”

“Ironic, isn’t it? A group of assholes made you less of an asshole.”

“Well, not everyone’s an asshole. Jester and Caduceus aren’t.”

“That is true.”

“What about you?”

“Hm?”

“Where would you be without us all?”

“Prison probably. Definitely running still.”

“You don’t think you’re running now?”

“I think I am running less.”

“Well, that’s better than sprinting.”

“Ja.” Caleb said, itching his arms at the thought of what he was running from.

“Time to wake Jester and Fjord up for their turn now,” Beau said. “As nice as your company is, I’m fucking exhausted, so like, night.”

“Ja, ja, of course. Good night, Beauregard.” Clabe said, and turned in for the night.

When Caleb woke up, it wasn’t immediately apparent that something was wrong. He wasn’t injured, he felt comfortable, he could hear the ambient noises of life around him. 

But nonetheless, something was wrong.

His first clue was the softness of the surface underneath him.

As he realised that this was strange, his eyes flew open, and above him was a pale yellow roof.

Now, Caleb was very sure that something was wrong, as the ceiling he’d gone to sleep under had been rough hewn stone, not this smooth painted surface.

Looking around, Caleb saw that he was in a bed with smooth white sheets, and fluffy blue pillows.

Very carefully, he pinched his arm to see if he was dreaming still.

He felt the pain in full, which traditionally meant he was dreaming, but he had heard of spells that could potentially make it so he could feel pain in his dream.

Sitting up, Caleb took stock of the room he was in.

It had several high bookshelves, filled with books, a set of drawers, and a desk covered in scribblings in his own familiar hand writing.

Sun was streaming in through a pair on ineffectual curtains, and Caleb could tell that it was 11am.

He heard footsteps come up to the one door in the room, and Caleb tensed as he heard it.

“I made french toast, so get your ass out here and eat it,” Nott’s familiar voice said, but Caleb didn’t relax.

Had Nott somehow entered this strange dream too? Or was it a construct with Nott’s voice. There was only one way to find out.

Caleb stood and upon noticing that he was in an unusually soft pair of pants only, he went over to the dresser and picked out a neutral set of clothes, noting the strange fabrics used in them. They were very tightly woven, the pattern only noticeable when looked at extremely closely. 

They felt strangely artificial in his hands, but still softer than his normal coarse and cheap clothing. 

Walking cautiously, he went out the door and followed the sound of Nott (or Nott’s voice) humming softly to a music that he couldn’t tell the source of.

The hall opened into a kitchen area that was all wrong. There were materials he didn’t know existed, shining on surfaces that shouldn’t shine, metals interwoven with unfamiliar materials in a casual way, and worst of all, a Nott who seemed comfortable in the space.

“Oh, good, I thought you were going to sleep all day,” Nott said, and as she turned around towards him, he could see she was the same little goblin girl he knew, but he knew she couldn’t be. His Nott wouldn’t be at home in a place like this. His Nott wouldn’t wear strangely died clothing, including a shirt that somehow had the words ‘A wise woman once said ‘Fuck this shit’, and she lived happily ever after’ on it.

“Ja, well, here I am.” Caleb said, forcing a smile onto his face.

“Here, I made us french toast. In celebration of surviving our first week of this semester,” Nott said, beckoning Caleb closer and handing him a plate once he came in to arms reach.

“Thank you, Nott,” He said, pretending this was all normal. “What do you have to do today?”

“Well besides lunch, which you are not getting out of, mister, I’ve got homework. Professor Hardwicke gave us homework, can you fucking believe it? It’s only week one of this ridiculous class, and she gives us homework? Outrageous.” The thing that was pretending to be Nott said.

“That is pretty harsh,” Caleb said.

He’d gained valuable information. This monster/dream being thought that they both went to a school. He could pretend to be at a school until he discovered how to get out, or until the rest of the Mighty Nein figured out how to wake him up.

“Lunch?” Caleb asked.

“Did you forget again?” Nott said.

“Uh. I guess so?”

“Lunch? With the rest of our weird little group of friends?”

Even though Caleb schooled his expression to sheepishness and understanding, Nott seemed to read something there that he was trying to hide.

“Are you feeling okay? ‘Cuz if you’re sick, that is a good enough reason to get out of going. Though Beau will forever make fun of you for getting sick during our first week back.” She said.

“Ah, nein, I am not sick. It is probably first week stress,” Caleb said, cursing internally at his shitty excuse.

Absent he itched his arms.

“Hey! No itching, how many times do I have to tell you,” Nott said, sternly, and Caleb instinctively looked down. 

The usual sight he was expecting was no where to be seen, his small scars left from the crystals, instead being left with some severe looking burn marks.

He tried to control his expression at seeing the strange sight, but Nott apparently once again caught him.

“Really, Caleb, are you okay?” She said.

“Ah… Sorry.” Caleb said. “I had a strange dream, and everything feels a little weird.”

“Okay, well, you can talk to me about anything, you know that right?”

“Ja, of course. Thank you.” Caleb said.

“If you don’t eat my delicious french toast, I will shove it down your throat,” Nott said, apparentlty seeing fit to change the subject. “For your own good of course. You don’t eat enough.”

Caleb smiled a little. This dream Nott was entertaining, and exactly like his normal Nott in her mothering.

Caleb ate the french toast. It was delicious. It didn’t help him decide whether it was a dream or not, or how to wake up.

After eating, he wandered back to the room he’d woken up in, and explored some more. 

Caleb was beyond relieved to see his spell books sitting innocently on the desk in the room, untouched and thankfully having been transported to this strange place as well.

He spent some more time staring at the scars on his arms, as if they held some sort of answer to what strange place he was in.

He also read through the papers on his desk which seemed to describe circular motion in some detail, with blank spaces where answers to questions should be. All printed on some strange pure white sort of paper and written in a strange type of ink.

“Caleb?” Nott’s voice filtered in from outside of his bubble of focus. 

He looked up from the strangely written book on physics he’d been reading, and startled at the sight of his friend standing next to him.

“Ah! Sorry! I didn’t mean to frighten you!” She said.

“It is fine, I guess I got a little… focused.” He said. “Did you want something?”

“We’re officially running late.” Nott announced. “For lunch, I mean. I came to hurry you up.”

“Uh, ja, sorry. I’ll be right out,” Caleb said, and was granted a smile from Nott, before she walked out of the room.

Caleb stood up, found a coat that was thankfully familiar, and went out.

Nott led him down out of the door, down some steps, and out onto what seemed like a road. Except instead of carts or people walking, there were strange metal contraptions lining the road.

“C’mon Cay, we’re already late!” Nott said, scurrying around one and opening part of it, and getting in.

Caleb reached out his hand and touched the contraption. He had noticed a separate part of it, and he touched it, and guessing, lifted the small section.

And to his surprise, he felt the part of it, loosen slightly.

Pulling it open, he got in the contraption and pulled the part of it shut behind him.

He turned and looked expectantly at Nott, who stared back at him like he was an alien.

“Seatbelt?” She said.

Caleb’s eyes flickered down to the strap of fabric that was pulled across Nott’s chest, guessing that a seatbelt was exactly as it sounded. 

He searched for a similar thing on his side, and found it in the reversed position to Nott’s. He pulled it across his body, acting like he knew what he was doing, and clipped it into the waiting spot, where he’d seen Nott’s go into as well.

Nott nodded, mumbled something under her breath that Caleb didn’t hear, and did something with her right hand, under the strange wheel like device.

Caleb felt the contraption come to life around him, and he clung to the seatbelt, covering his body, as if that could save him from whatever terrible beast he’d willingly gotten in.

Nott didn’t seem to notice his terror, and she spun the wheel, and they started moving.

What kind of fucking place was this strange dream world, Caleb wondered.

He calmed down slightly as the contraption moved along, telling himself it was just a mechanical cart. That’s all it was. He could deal with that, until he got out of this dream.

He found himself missing his Nott. The normal one. The one that drunk too much and didn’t drive awful mechanical carts, and who shot crossbow bolts at her friends because it got her something. (He thought back semi-fondly to the time that Nott had shot him at the Vellum Steeple archives in Uthodurn, then winced slightly. That had been an expensive exchange.)

“Oh look, there they are!” Nott said, interrupting his thoughts, pointing through the big front window to a group of people, that he identified as strange dream versions of his own friends.

He picked them out one by one, Fjord was there, Caduceus, Jester, Beau, and then he spied the next two people and it felt like his breath had been punched out of him.

Yasha.

And worse.

Mollymauk.

He absently noted that Nott had gotten out of the mechanical cart, and he was just sitting in it, staring at his dead friend.

He watched as Mollymauk strolled over to the cart, and knocked out a rhythm on the clear glass window.

“Hello? Anyone in there?” Mollymauk’s crushingly familiar voice rang out, slightly muffled through the glass, but recognisable all the same. “Caleb, you okay?”

It was hearing his name in Mollymauk’s lilting accent gain jolted him out of his trance.

“Uh, ja, I am sorry. Getting out now,” Caleb said, turning to figure out how to undo his seatbelt, and getting out of the car in the same graceless movement he’d used to get in.

“Well, there’s my boy! How are you, darling?” Molly said, kissing Caleb on the cheek.

“Um, ja, I am good, thank you. How are you?” Caleb said, thinking that being shocked within an inch of your life by seeing your dead friend come to life was no reason to abandon one’s manners.

“Oh, I’m all the better for seeing you, my love,” Molly said with a grin, and then it dimmed slightly when Caleb only gave a weak smile in return. “Are you sure you’re okay? You seem a bit off.”

“Uh, I am not feeling so well, sorry Mollymauk.” Caleb said, searching for an excuse, and saying the first thing that came to mind. 

His anxious fingers ached for release, and began scratching at what used to be scars, but had turned into burns.

Molly looked even more concerned, but his face smoothed out into understanding after a few moments.

“Say the word, and I can make an excuse for us to leave,” Molly said, leaning in close to whisper in Caleb’s ear. 

“Nein, Mollymauk, I will be fine,” Caleb said, hoping he sounded the least bit convincing.

“Well, then, off to lunch we go. Just let me know if you change your mind, darling.” Molly said, then raised his voice so everyone else could hear him. “Come on, you lot! Before they give away our table!”

“They wouldn’t dare,” Jester said, bouncing over, then peered at Caleb. “Hello, Caaaaleb, you don’t look so good.”

“I am fine, danke Jester. Just a bit tired.” Caleb said, mustering up a smile.

“He’s being stubborn, but I’ve got him, don’t you worry, little Jester.” Molly said, grabbing Caleb’s arm, and pulling him in the direction of the others, before Caleb could even say anything in defence of himself.

Caleb blanched at the idea of facing Yasha again, and tried his best to slow down his pace, but Molly was stronger than him, and kept the two of them moving.

Caleb gave in after a few moments of subtle struggle. He’d already seen his dead friend come back to life, what was one more friend who’d been brainwashed into evil?

“Yes, thank you, Mollymauk, hallo all,” Caleb said, once the unstoppable force that was the purple tiefling had stopped motoring him forward.

“Caleb! Nice to see you, it’s been a while,” Caduceus said in his calm tone. Leaning down to kiss Caleb on the cheek.

Caleb had to force himself to not flinch in his worked up, anxious state. It was just Caduceus, he told himself. Maybe some freaky dream version of Caduceus, but still.

And on second thought, why had Caduceus kissed him on the cheek? Molly was maybe in character, but Caduceus? This universe just kept getting weirder and weirder.

“It’s been less than 24 hours, Cad,” Molly said. “But, yes, it is nice to see our boy again, isn’t it?”

After everyone else greeted Caleb, and they started all walking in a predetermined direction, so it seemed everyone knew exactly where they were going, except him.

Caleb let himself be led along, but all the while his mind was working furiously.

Even if this was a dream, he had to wake up at some point? He wasn’t usually a lucid dreamer, so it could possibly be a spell. 

Actually, a spell would make perfect sense, as he had touched those weird glowing runes in the wizard’s lair.

So, he just had to find a way out of the spell.

He looked at Mollymauk.

Maybe, that could wait, just a little bit, though. There was no hurry, right? He was allowed to enjoy his dead friend’s company for a little bit. 

Caleb ruthlessly shoved down the part of him that whispered that he could be back in the asylum again. This was different. It was. 

At some point, Mollymauk and Caduceus came up on either side of him, both grabbing one of his hands each, knocking him out of his thoughts.

“Whatcha thinking about, book boy?” Mollymauk said, with a teasing smile that made Caleb’s heart ache. 

“You do look very deep in thought, Mr. Caleb,” Caduceus said.

Caleb made the executive decision as the person in charge of himself, to give himself 24 hours to just go with it, and enjoy things. Then he could worry about getting out of it. 24 hours wouldn’t hurt.

“Just… things,” Caleb said, vaguely.

“That’s our boy, always thinking about ‘things’,” Molly said with a grin.

Caleb smiled back, finally giving in. It was hard to stay clammed up around Molly’s charm.

“There’s that lovely smile I was hoping for,” Molly said. “What do you think, Cad, should he be allowed to wave that thing around all willynilly? That thing’s basically a weapon of mass destruction.”

“To my knowledge, I haven’t killed anyone with just my smile, yet, Mollymauk.” Caleb said, reflecting briefly on all the people he had killed, just not with a smile.

Caleb missed Molly and Caduceus exchanging looks at his words. They pressed closer to him slightly, nudging him out of bad thoughts and back to the bizarre conversation he’d found himself in.

“I think his smile is more a tool of mischief than a weapon, Molly,” Caduceus said. “Used to steal food and hugs more than anything.”

“That is true, though if you think the smile is bad, you should see those baby blues,” Molly said.

“Enough with the describing me, please,” Caleb said in a strangled tone. Seriously, what was going on? He had the sudden urge to itch his arms again, driven by anxiety, but with both arms firmly grasped in his friends’, he was out of luck.

Everyone stopped outside a building that had a large sign saying ‘The Invulnerable Vagrant’ perched on the top. Somehow, Caleb didn’t think it would be the familiar magic shop that he knew.

He was proven right, when upon entering, he noticed all the tables and brightly coloured booths. At the entrance where they came in was a bar with stools perched next to it.

The group was quickly ushered to a large booth in the back, and it seemed like the waiter definitely knew them.

Caleb briefly debated with himself about whether he wanted a seat where he could see the whole room with ease, or an end seat where he could slip out without trouble.

The choice was taken away from him though pretty quickly, as he was forced in the middle of the group.

At least he had a vantage point of the whole room and all the entrances from where he was, and he supposed he could go up over the table if something happened.

Menu’s were passed around, though Caleb noticed only Jester and Caduceus actually looked at them, so Caleb realised that this must be a common hang out spot, if no one had to consult the menu for what they wanted.

Beneath his mostly calm exterior, Caleb’s stomach was rolling violently in anxiety, so he decided to just get some water, and nothing else.

“Hey, Caleb, Caleb, Caleb, look at me,” He heard Beau saying, and he complied, looking at her. “Bitch.”

Caleb gave a wry smile. At least one thing was the same in this strange world.

He turned his head to view Mollymauk once more, revelling in his not so dead friend. He was not looking forward to losing the man once more upon waking.

Caleb felt like face palming as an obvious thought came to him. Magic. If he could do magic here, then he could just dispel the spell, right?

“Um, could I just, get past you, please—” He said, before Caduceus moved out from his side, leaving him free to go find the bathroom.

He left, feeling eyes on his back as he went. He supposed to the dream versions of his friends, he was acting quite strangely.

Finding his way to the bathroom easily enough, he locked himself in one of the stalls, barely taking the time to marvel at the number of them and how clean they were. 

Concentrating, he tried to summon Frumpkin, and when nothing happened, he cursed in Zemnian under his breath.

Okay, no magic. That was fine. This was fine.

Oh gods, this was not fine. His breathing sped up, heart race picking up, as his surroundings greyed out.

A few minutes went by as Caleb had a pretty severe panic attack.

Eventually, after it passed, he slumped against the stall wall.

Just one more try, he promised himself.

He put his hands out, called upon his magic for the floating lights he liked to make.

One by one, three of them popped into existence, casting a light glow on Caleb’s face as he let out a sigh of relief. 

No Frumpkin for some reason. That was fine, he still had his magic, he could cast Find Familiar later and get Frumpkin back hopefully.

He bathed in the glow of the dancing lights for about a minute as he came down from his panic attack, before he heard the door to the bathroom open.

“Caleb?” Nott’s voice echoed in the emptiness of the bathroom space.

Caleb debated momentarily staying quiet, but realised that would achieve nothing, and so spoke up.

“Ja?”

“You’ve been in here a while, everything okay?” Nott sounded like she was choosing her words carefully, which just had the effect of Caleb missing his Nott more.

“Ja, I am fine, liebling. I’ll be out in a minute.”

“I’m gonna wait for you,” The goblin girl said firmly, and Caleb stifled a sigh.

Caleb gave in to the inevitable, dispelled the globules of light, and unlocked the stall door, revealing his face to his little friend.

“Oh,” Nott said, upon spotting his face. He could only assume that he looked as weary and upset as he felt. That day had not been easy, despite only being up for a few hours. “You can go home if you want. No one will make you stay when you look like, well, that.”

“Ja, I think that will be best,” Caleb said, not really feeling like facing any more of the day than he had to. He was being given an out, and by god, would he take it.

“Okay, I’m helping Jester later, so I can’t drive you back, but Caduceus has his van, is that okay?” Nott asked, twisting her neck to look up at him with her big yellow eyes.

“Ja, that is fine,” Caleb said weakly.

“If you wanna talk about whatever’s going on, you know I’m here, right? I’ll be home in a few hours, and we can talk then.”

“Ja, I know,” Caleb said dismissively.

“Really, though. You can talk to me about anything. Best friends, right?” Nott said, peering at him intently.

“Of course, Nott. Best friends.” Caleb wondered what his life was coming to when he couldn’t even deceive dream version of his friends.

Nott towed him back out to the table, creeping out and then going much more confidently when she saw that no one was about to jump out and tell her off for going into the men’s bathroom.

When everyone saw Caleb, he watched them all look worried, and then all pretend one by one that they hadn’t noticed how awful he looked.

And Caleb knew he looked awful. He’d caught a glimpse of himself in the bathroom mirror as he was dragged out, and even though he was clean, he still looked awful.

“Caduceus, can you please drive Caleb home, he’s not feeling so good.” Nott said in one big rush, as though trying not to call attention to the request.

“Sure I will. Ready to go now, Caleb?” Caduceus said, getting up, and moving to Caleb’s side to steady him. Caleb didn’t realise he was swaying until Caduceus was there to keep him steady.

“I’ll come too,” Molly said, sliding out of the booth.

Caleb was too tired to argue, ready to just be out of there.

He didn’t really remember being led to another mechanical cart, which Nott had called a ‘van’, but he was wide aware once it turned on again.

“How’re you feeling, love?” Molly said next to him. 

“I am fine, thank you, Mollymauk.” Caleb said, trying not to show his terror at the worrying noises the van was making. Nott’s contraption hadn’t made noises like that, he thought.

“You’re very obviously not, but okay, I’ll play along.” Molly said, and leaned into Caleb side, causing Caleb to tense up.

Molly noticed, and leaned back away.

“Woah, what’s up with you?” He said.

“Nothing, I’m fine. I’m sorry for reacting, I was just not expecting that.” Caleb said.

“I thought we’d gotten over the ‘tensing when we touch you’ part of our relationship.” Molly said. 

“Apparently not,” Caleb said, not even wanting to think on what Molly’s last remark meant.

He was going crazy, stuck in this world. And as someone who’d spent time in a literal mental asylum, that meant something.

The ‘van’ eventually stopped, and Caleb looked out the glass window to see the housing unit he vaguely remembered from earlier. 

Caleb stumbled out, causing Molly to catch his elbow to hold him steady.

Caduceus came around the side of the van and lead them back to the place Caleb remembered coming from that morning, occasionally looking back to see if Caleb and Molly were still following.

When they got to the place where Caleb and Nott had come out of, Caduceus reached into his pocket and pulled out a key that he inserted into the lock.

“Got it from Nott,” He said. “She guessed you’d forgotten yours.”

Caleb nodded weakly, thankful that Caduceus didn’t expect any sort of reply.

The door was opened before him, and Caleb walked in, tracing from brief memory, that path back to what was supposedly ‘his room’.

He opened the door to the bedroom, and was greeted with the most amazing sight.

Frumpkin was sitting on his bed, calmly licking himself, as if everything was okay in the world.

Caleb collapsed onto the bed and pet Frumpkin vigorously. 

Everything faded out for a few moments, as he pulled the most wonderful cat in the world close.

“Glad to see at least one of us got a good response from you today,” Molly said from where he was leaning against the doorway, his tail lazily swaying behind him.

Caleb looked up at where Molly was. What did the tiefling mean by that?

Molly came over and sat on the bed, a little way away from where Caleb was sitting. 

“You wanna explain what’s going on now? What’s got you all riled up there, Mr. Caleb?” He said.

“Uh, I am just not feeling very well, Mollymauk,” Caleb said.

“Bullshit,” Molly said, with force behind it. “You’re hiding something, I can tell.”

Caleb wondered why this version of Mollymauk could read him so well, when even his version of Nott had trouble sometimes.

“I don’t know what you are talking about,” Caleb said, his accent getting stronger in his distress.

“Uh huh. Sure. You expect me to believe that? Caleb, darling, I love you, please just talk to me.”

Caleb’s brain shut down at Mollymauk’s words.

He WHAT?

Oh gods, suddenly it all made sense. For someone so smart, he was really quite dumb.

In this universe, Mollymauk, Caleb, and probably Caduceus were in a relationship.

That explained so much about the way that the two men were acting towards Caleb.

Caleb felt his face go blank in hearing the words.

His first thought was, ‘Oh, he’s lying, he must be, how could anyone love a despicable human like me.’

His second thought was, ‘If he’s not lying then I’ve deceived him into loving me, and that makes me even more despicable, how could I.’

And then after that, his thoughts just devolved into screaming nonsense.

“Caleb?” Molly said cautiously, apparently seeing some of what was going on in the Zemnian man’s mind.

Only quick thinking on Caleb’s part while his mind was an on fire wreck saved Caleb from further inquisition.

“You are right, Mollymauk, I have been acting strangely, but right now I find myself unable to talk about it. Soon, hopefully, but not right now. Will you accept that?” He said.

Molly took the words with grace, considered for a second, and then spoke.

“As long as you promise to talk about it when you can. You know that keeping it bottled up isn’t healthy for you, we’ve talked about this. Also, your therapist has talked about this,” He said. “So, you promise?”

“Ja, Mollymauk, I promise,” Caleb said, feeling only a little guilt as he could probably never talk about it with this strange dream revived Mollymauk, and therefore wouldn’t be breaking his promise by not talking about it.

“Good. Now come on, sleep time, you look like a trainwreck,” Mollymauk said, and began shucking his own coat and shoes.

Caleb was too exhausted to care that it looked like he was going to be sleeping in the same bed as his dead friend.

All he wanted was to pass out and wake up back with his own friends, the real versions of them.

Caleb got changed with ruthless efficiency, and lay down in the large too soft bed, and Molly lay down too, snuggling against his side.

A few moments later, Caduceus wandered in and smiled at the scene and started getting ready for bed as well.

Caleb wanted to scream when the large man lay down in the bed, but instead he let his eyes flutter shut, and his mind begin the nightly routine of counting to the highest number he could before falling asleep.

Within minutes, his tired body and mind gave in and he drifted off.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh gosh, realised it's been like 8 months since I posted chapter 1. My sincerest apologies for not updating sooner, I really struggled with chapter 2, and an actual plot, but I think I'm back on track!
> 
> Super unedited, sorry, as it's 4am and I have to be up at 7, and just want to be done with this chapter, so here you go!
> 
> Hope you enjoy :)

About 5 hours later, Caleb woke to an empty bed and pretended he didn’t ache slightly at the thought.

His next thought was that as he was in this too soft bed, that meant he hadn’t been miraculously transported back to his own world.

Fuck.

As he sat up, he twisted to look for any sign of his friends who had come home with him, and saw a note on the bed next to him in Molly’s scrawling handwriting.

‘Dearest Caleb!

We stayed for a bit hoping you’d wake up rested and right again, but apparently you’ve turned into a very heavy sleeper when we weren’t looking!

Text us if you need us, and remember that you promised to talk soon, I’m holding you to that, mister!

Love from Molly!’

There was a line beneath the main message in Caduceus’ neat hand.

‘Remember your healthy coping mechanisms, please Mr. Caleb. We’d hate to lose you when you’re finally flourishing.’

Caleb wondered what ‘text’ meant in that context, as it certainly didn’t mean a book, and laughed bitterly to himself at the coping mechanisms comment. As if he had any healthy ones.

Getting up and looking out the window, Caleb saw the light from the sun was fading.

Nott had said that it was just lunch, so unless in classic Mighty Nein manner, the fake dream versions of his friends had gotten in to trouble, the goblin woman should be back in their house by then.

Caleb looked wistfully at the bed, wishing he could just sleep through the rest of this problem, but set his shoulders, and opened the door to the other areas of the house.

If he could find Nott, he was planning to get more information about this dream out of her. About what kind of world he’d found himself in. He had a few questions.

1) Was there magic here?

2) How did he get the burns on his arms, instead of crystal scars?

3) How long had this dream Caleb been in a relationship with Caduceus and Molly, and literally, what the fuck.

For the third question, he wasn’t denying both men weren’t attractive, and maybe if he wasn’t such a fuck up he would have considered for the briefest moment, he might have considered asking them out. Although, a) Molly was dead, and even a dream world couldn’t change that fact, and b) no one would want him anyway so there was no point.

But anyway, none of that mattered, because he was a piece of shit, and as such nothing would come from it.

Except it already had, a traitor part of his mind whispered. Somehow in this world, you got them both to love you.

Caleb shook his head, as if to dislodge the thoughts.

Enough, he thought. He was on an information gathering mission. He could focus on those thoughts later, or even better, never.

When he walked out to what he assumed was the living area of the house, he saw Nott sitting on the sofa, doing something with her hands.

He walked closer, and saw she was… knitting? He didn’t know she knew how to knit! Thought maybe this dream version of Nott was different, as that didn’t seem like the Nott he knew.

As he approached, she looked up and gave a genuine smile.

“Well hello Mr. Sleepy Head! I was wondering when you’d be up!” She said.

“Ah, yes, well, here I am,” Caleb said, forcing himself to smile lightly.

“How are you feeling? Molly and Caduceus said you went straight to sleep. Did that help at all?”

“Ah ja, I am feeling much better, thank you.” 

Nott ran her eyes over him, taking in how he looked, probably taking in details such as his body language, stance, facial expressions, to build a picture of his well-being.

He saw her linger over his face, and he wondered what he looked like, as he was still emotionally exhausted, even after 5 hours sleep.

What Nott saw, he wasn’t sure, but when she nodded slightly and patted the couch next to her, he obeyed.

“Are you going to talk about it now?” Nott asked, her tone deceptively mild, as if she wasn’t ready to mother him to death at a minute sign of distress.

“I… am not sure,” Caleb said, only the knowledge that this wasn’t his Nott keeping him from blurting out everything he was thinking. “Can I ask a few… odd questions first?”

“Yeah, of course. Whatever you want, Cay.” Nott said.

“Okay, just humour me for a minute okay, these questions are going to seem really, really strange,” Caleb said, not being able to think of any subtle way to get the information he wanted. 

Nott raised an eyebrow, but nodded, and he took a deep breath.

“Do you believe in magic?” Caleb said.

“HUH?” Nott said. “What kind of fucking question is that? You said strange, but like, come on, really?”

“Nott, you did agree to humour me, please,” Caleb reminded her, and Nott subsided slightly.

“Okay, well, uh, holy fuck I don’t know. No? I guess? Because I would have seen it by now if it existed.” She said.

One question answered, but not definitively. Magic didn’t exist to Nott’s knowledge, but that didn’t mean it didn’t exist at all. However, it did mean that this Nott was very, very different to his Nott.

“Thank you. Next weird question. How did I get these scars?” Caleb said, gesturing to the burn scars, and bracing himself for Nott’s reaction to his seeming ‘forgetting’.

“What? Caleb, are you feeling okay? Like, do I need to call your therapist?” Nott said, sounding worried.

“Nott, please answer the question,” Caleb said, some unknown but hard tone in his voice.

She didn’t look happy, but answered him anyway.

“There was… a fire. That you started, because you were made to.” She said.

“Made to by who?” Caleb pressed on for more information, 

“By Trent Ikithon, the man who kidnapped you as a child and trained you as the perfect soldier.” Nott said, and something squirmed inside him at the pain on his friend’s face, as she recounted the tale.

Caleb let out a sigh, and sat back in his seat. He had so many questions from that one sentence. Kidnapped, not taken willingly? And training as a perfect soldier rather than an assassin was very different.

“Thank you, Nott. I am sorry I made you say that,” Caleb said.

“Great, are you sorry enough to tell me why you asked that, and what’s going on? Because I’m not an idiot, and something very clearly is.” Nott said, in a no nonsense tone. “If you don’t tell me, I swear to G-d that I’m calling Vex.”

“Uh-” Caleb started to say something, before Nott cut him off.

“If you’re about to ask who Vex is, I’m definitely calling her, and then everyone else, because that’s not you, Cay.”

“Look, wait, wait, before you call anyone,” Caleb said, assuming ‘calling’ was a way to send a message. “I can explain I promise. You trust me, right?”

He felt a little guilty manipulating her into calming down, but more people meant more suspicion, more chance of them finding out all his secrets. He just had to keep everyone calm until he could figure out the spell to get him home. That was all. Then he’d be back with his own friends, and he’d tell them about the fake versions of them, and they’d all laugh about it together, and it would be right again.

Nott sat back down, scowling as she did so.

“I know what you’re doing, and I want it noted that I don’t like it, but fine. Explain.” She said.

“Just one more question,” Caleb said, wincing when Nott glared at him. “Please, then I’ll explain, I promise.”

“Fine. One.”

Caleb debated for a moment about whether the question of the relationship between him, Caduceus, and Molly was important enough to ask about, or whether he should quickly come up with a more urgent one.

Finally, he gave in to his curiosity, and just asked.

“How long have Caduceus, Molly, and I been in a relationship and how did it start?” He said.

“That’s two questions. Choose one.” Nott said, her arms crossed, and her anger masking her worry.

“How did it start?”Caleb said, after thinking for a moment.

“Molly and Caduceus talked about it and ambushed you by taking you out to a bookstore cafe, where they confessed their feelings for you, and you said you’d think about it. 24 hours of panic later, you said yes. Cue the goopiest romance ever.” Nott said, then went on, her voice tinged with a deadly edge. “There. Now, explain. You promised.”

“Ja, I sure did,” Caleb said, regretting that promise almost immediately. He suddenly couldn’t think of any appropriate explanation that wasn’t the truth.

“If you lie to me, I will be able to tell,” Nott said, and her serious tone convinced Caleb that she would be able to.

Well, fuck, Caleb thought.

Nott watched Caleb floundering for several moments, but she didn’t lessen the tension any, knowing that he’d either tell her the truth of his own accord, or she’d force it out of him.

Finally, she saw something in his eyes settle, and he started talking. It almost sounded rehearsed, as though he’d told the story in a similar way before.

First, she was convinced that he’d literally lost his mind, but as soon as Caleb demonstrated the magic he’d been talking about, her eyes widened.

If magic was real, then he must be telling the truth.

Oh g-d. Poor Caleb. The things he’d done, the things he’d been made to do. Her poor, poor boy.

As he talked of magic, of fire, of impossible things become possible, of pain, of suffering, of the things he’d gone through, the family he’d lost and then the family he’d found, Nott watched her impossibly strong boy wilt more and more as the story poured out of him as though being pulled.

When he finished, he hung his head as though expecting retribution for his story, but she simply took him into her arms, and held him.

She felt her body shaking in an echo of his sobs as he let all his emotion out, and she murmured soft assurances.

“Do you… really want to go back?” Nott asked quietly, when he’d finished and drawn back from her embrace.

“I have to, Nott. It’s all I know.”

“You deserve to be safe, though.”

“I do not deserve anything.”

“Cay,” Nott chided, then stopped herself. This version of Caleb had never gone to therapy, he’d never had the chance to live quietly for a while and just heal. “You deserve the world and more. But I’m not going to argue with you.” 

Caleb looked at her with exhausted eyes, and she watched as he struggled to hold in words. She interrupted before his struggle could turn into real words.

“You’re convinced this is a fake world right? From a spell, or something? Is there any way I could prove to you that it’s not?” She said.

Caleb seemed to struggle for words again.

“It is… possible that this world is not fake, and that I have been transported here by means of magic. Given the level of, well, awareness you and everyone else has, it’s becoming more and more likely that that’s true. The level of detail… well it would take a lot of power to maintain a spell that intricate.”

“So, I don’t have to convince you at all because you’re convincing yourself?” Nott said, her sharp eyes noticing the lack of smile, as small as she’d hoped it would be, that should have accompanied her joke.

“Ja, I guess I am.”

“Is there like a spell you can do to get rid of another spell?” She asked.

“Ja, there is a dispelling spell, but I do not have it prepared. I was going to do it once I slept for a substantial amount of time.” 

Nott nodded at that, took it in stride and thought about what to say next.

“Caleb…” Nott said, hesitating slightly before plowing ahead. “I think you should tell the rest of our friends else about this. Especially Molly and Caduceus. First, everyone help you keep your cover while you figure out how to get back, and second, it’s not fair to those two to pretend you’re the same Caleb that they love.”

Caleb took her suggestion better than she thought. The Caleb she knew from 2 years ago, when she’d first met him, would have probably not taken something like that very well at all. He actually seemed to be considering her words though.

“I have been thinking that it has been difficult to hide that something was wrong from them, while adjusting.” Caleb admitted.

“Also, if you stay here for more than two days, you’re going to need to cram a whole bunch of physics knowledge very quickly, and the others could definitely help with that.” Nott said, trying to think of other ways to convince him.

She watched as he paused for a moment, contemplating what to say, before it came out in a cautious whisper.

“What if… what if they look at me differently. I’m a garbage person, Nott, the things I’ve done… I don’t deserve them. I don’t deserve any of you.”

Nott felt like she was getting emotional whiplash from this entire conversation, but this was the final straw.

“Cay, I love you but shut up. Saying you don’t deserve us, is taking away from our choice to love you. Guess what, you don’t get to make that decision!” She said, and Caleb looked taken aback at her ferocity. Seeing his expression, her ire calmed somewhat. “I’m sorry, but it’s not your choice to make. You just have to deal with the fact that we all love you, in different ways.”

“You are… right. I am sorry for insulting you, it was not my intention.” He said, his accent thick in his apology.

“It’s fine, Cay. And of course they’re going to look at you differently, you’re a different person with different experiences and memories, but you’re still our Caleb. Any version of you is still ours.” 

“Ja, okay, I will tell them. Thank you,” He said, looked her in the eyes as he thanked her.

“Good boy,” She said with a grin, and was rewarded with a small smile from Caleb. “Now, tomorrow morning I will tell you all about this world, but right now, you look like you’re about to fall over, so let me cook us some dinner, and you can crash, again. I’ll keep Molly and Cad off your back until tomorrow.”

Caleb gave in to her mothering without fight, and she dragged him to the kitchen island so that she could keep an eye on him as she cooked.

She made pasta with pesto, as it was quick, easy, and simple to make, and they had all the ingredients ready. 

Watching as Caleb tried to stay awake to eat it, despite his recent nap, was rather entertaining to Nott.

When she decided he’d eaten enough, she sent him off to his bedroom with the reminder to cue up the dispelling spell or whatever, and started doing the dishes as she contemplated what she’d just learned about one of her best friends.

The suffering he’d gone through to get to where he was, the breadth of it was startling. It was a similar story of pain to the Caleb she knew, but the differences were enough to horrify her.

And if this new Caleb was there, did that mean that her Caleb was in his world? With his version of their friends?

She wanted this more broken Caleb to not have to go back, but she wasn’t sure she wanted that at the expense of her Caleb being stuck in a world with magic where he had none.

The next morning, Caleb woke with the full expectation that he’d still be in this strange new world. When he opened his eyes, he was proven right.

Sighing, he sat up and got to preparing his spells for the day.

Once he had spent the time doing so, he got ready for the day, bathing and changing into new clothes. He pulled the familiar coat tight around him, despite the middling temperature in the house, wishing he could command Frumpkin to scarf around his neck, but the cat was nowhere to be seen.

He went out to the living area, to see that Nott was already up, knitting again.

“Guten morgen,” he said, sinking into the too soft seat next to her.

“Good morning, Cay, how are you feeling?”

“I am fine, thank you,” he said, though he wasn’t yet sure how to answer the question truthfully. Thankfully though, Nott seemed to accept his answer without comment. “And you?”

“Also fine. Still processing, mostly.”

“That makes sense. I imagine finding out magic exists for the first time without growing up with it is quite shocking.” Caleb said politely.

“Shocking, yup that’s one way to put it.” Nott said, with a wry smile. “Are you ready to tell more people you unbelievable tale?”

“Ja, I am prepared.”

“Great, I’ll text them to come over,” Nott said, reaching into her pocket.

“Wait, I will try the dispelling spell first,” Caleb said, putting a hand out to stop her.

“Oh yes, silly me. Go for it.”

“Well, if this is the last time I see you, then… thank you, liebling.” Caleb gave her a heartbreaking smile.

“Oh… of course, Lebby.” Nott said, giving the same smile back.

Caleb made the somatic motion, said the verbal component, using a spell slot at the highest level he had, squeezing his eyes shut and centring the spell on himself, assuming that the universe shifting magic had been done on him.

He felt the spell happen, but felt no change in himself or the space around him.

Levering open his eyes, he saw an expectant Nott looking up at him, and the same living area around him.

“It didn’t work,” He stated the obvious, a lump in his throat.

“It was very impressive looking,” Nott said, looking unsure of herself and what she was saying.

“Fuck.”

“Yeah. What are you going to do now?” 

“I suppose I could create a spell. I was doing that back in my world, for… well, you.” Caleb said, wincing at the thought. It would have to be a very high level spell probably. Other transportation spells that he’d heard of or looked into were quite difficult and required expensive components.

“What? What spell were you creating for me?” Nott said, surprised.

“Oh, uh, you were not always a goblin, you had been… transformed into one.”

“Transformed?” Nott said, her voice rising in pitch. “By who?”

“We do not know, it was a woman working with goblins.”

“How do you not know?! That definitely seems like something you should know!” Her voice reaching hysterical. “What happened to my husband, my son, were they okay??”

Caleb looked down at his friend, surprised at her reaction, and resigns himself to telling her the story that his version of her had once told him and the rest of the Mighty Nein, in what seemed like so long ago. That was before Xhorhas, the Bright Queen, Essek, everything. 

Once he’d told her the story, Nott paced around the room a bit, trying to bleed off excess energy that had come from the telling of the tale.

“Forgive me, Nott, but I do not understand why this is upsetting you so much. You were not the one this was done to, you are safe and in one piece, correct?” Caleb said, slowly, and Nott paused for a moment, taking a deep breath in before speaking.

“I don’t know, it’s just… it was done to a version of me. That means something. And well, there are… similarities to my own life, I guess.” She said.

“Your own life? I am afraid you have me at a disadvantage. You know my life story, but I do not know yours.”

“Ha, yes. My story, right. Well, in this world, you and I are both in what’s known as the Witness Protection programme. I was living a normal life with my husband, and son, and our shop, until my family was kidnapped over some imagined feud that someone had because of Yeza’s work. I managed to kill our captor, and we escaped, but we hadn’t realised that our kidnapper was part of a bigger terrorist organisation. And so, my family was taken into the programme, but it was for their safety that we were separated, so that if one of us was found, we all wouldn’t be hurt.” Nott said, with varying facial expressions as she told her story. When she mentioned killing the kidnapper, an almost angry look crossed her face, and the rest of the time, mostly sad expressions. Despite the sadness evident on her face, her eyes held a steely look, as if warning anyone looking to not cross her.

“Veth Brennato, you amaze me,” Caleb said, wanting the sadness off his best friend’s face. 

“That’s my name in your world as well?” Nott asked, potentially trying to distract Caleb from the blush colouring her cheeks.

“Ja, it is. Do you have any other questions?” Caleb said.

“Hmm.” Nott took a moment to think. “Do you know how long the spell will take to create?” 

“It is hard to give an exact time, and especially as I don’t have access to any other texts, but at least a month, I would say.” He said, and Nott grimaced.

“Sounds like you’ll have to cram a bunch of physics knowledge.” She said, then hesitated. “Do you… do you think that this world’s Caleb is stuck in your world?”

“That is… also hard to say. I think that if the other version of me is, my friends will take good care of him. We did not have any pressing matters after the mission we were on, so he will be able to adjust and stay safe.”

“Did any of your versions of us go to therapy?” Nott asked, and Caleb was confused at the sudden change of subject.

“Ah, no?”

“Well, then I expect that he’s coaching them all in how to love themselves.” Nott said, a grin creeping across her face.

“We certainly all need it.”

“You know that you’re going to have to explain this all to Vex.”

“Vex?”

“Your therapist.”

“Ah. Can I not just… cancel?”

“I think it would be very useful for you to talk to her. You can decide how much to tell her, but she’s been very useful for my version of you to talk to.” Nott said, levelling a stern look at Caleb.

“Ja, okay. I will at least meet her.”

“Great! Now I’m gonna text Molly and Cad, and you’re going to tell them what you told me last night. Sound good?” Nott said, but Caleb could tell he didn’t have a choice.

Nott seemed to see the resignation on his face, and shuffled closer to him on the couch, and put her hand on his arm.

“You did say you would tell them,” She said.

“Ja, I did.”

“I think it would help.”

“Mmhm.”

“They can help tell the rest of the group, and they love you too. It’s not fair to them to ignore them for the whole time you’re here.” Nott said, and Caleb knew she was right, he just didn’t want to have to face them and explain how much of a piece of shit he was once more.

“You are right, of course,” He said, closing his eyes for a brief moment. “Would you please let them know to come over.”

“Of course, Cay.” Nott said, and pulled something out of her pocket.

Caleb watched as the box she had grabbed lit up with artificial light, and she danced her fingers over it, changing what the light looked like. He was fascinated as she got to a point where letters were on the box’s surface, and he read the text on it.

_Molly + Cad + Nott_

_Molly: fine, instead I propose that when I give you my last dollar you will tell me what he said_

_Nott: >:(_

_Molly: ugh u r infurating, idk how he puts up with you_

_Nott: >:((_

_Cad: >:((_

_Molly: fine! Im sorry, I take it back, ur the best and ily_

Caleb watched as Nott touched where the letters were on the bottom half of the box and they showed up in a small box, then appeared in the same way as the words above.

_Nott: He wants you two to come over. He’s going to explain._

A box with dots in it appeared for a short while, until more text popped up on the box.

_Cad: We’re on our way._

Caleb tried to hide his anxiety about the upcoming conversation and distract himself by asking what the box was, but quickly found himself fascinated as Nott explained and showed him what the box could do. 

As she was showing him a game on the ‘phone’ called ‘Candy Crush’, there was a knock at the door, before it opened, and Molly led the way in front of Caduceus.

“My fabulous friends, I am gracing you with my presence! Bow down before me,” Molly said, before Caduceus tapped him on the head, and stepped forward.

“Hello, both of you. Caleb, how are you feeling? You look tired.” Caduceus said, and leaned down to kiss him on the cheek.

Caleb forced himself not to flinch away, and avoided the gut-wrenchingly understanding look in Nott’s eyes.

He was endured Molly’s kiss as well, and was glad when both of the men sat down on the other couch, and ceased from being a looming presence above him.

Not that he thought they’d hurt him, he was just an anxious mess and was feeling trapped in all the worst ways. Bafflingly, Caleb suspected that they could tell that, and sat away from him on purpose. He had no idea how that made him feel. 

As they looked at him, Caleb could see the worry hidden in their faces, the lines at the corners of their eyes creased, their mouths slightly hard, the look in their eyes.

Nott turned to him, and took his hand in hers.

His friend a comforting presence at his side, he began his explanation of his wild story.

**Author's Note:**

> This story came to me one day, and I knew I had to write it. Excuse my lack of editing. Thanks to Rowan and Carley for helping me with the character's majors!
> 
> Please comment what you liked, didn't like, whether you want more, and so on!
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
